Over the past two or three weeks, I finally experienced God’s love for me. Completely and truly. I feel conviction, but no longer condemnation. And just over the past two days, the LORD has laid some things on my heart. Showing me the sins I’ve committed and my need to repent.
What sins may you ask? Not loving others as Christ loves me.
As Christians, we are called to be like Christ. Christian means “Little Christ”. We are to walk and loved as He first loved us (Ephesians 5:2). With all the evil that is going on in the world, we seem to forget that we still need to love others no matter what wrongs they commit against us. We are called to love our enemies (Matthew 5:43-45), so much to the point that we are willing to die for them, just as while we were still His enemy, Jesus died for us (Romans 5:8).
I remember when I was getting close to graduating high school, so many people would tell me to enjoy it because I would miss it. Here I am, six years later, and I still don’t miss it.
This week is the first week back to school and I’m still just as glad this year as I was the year after I graduation that I don’t have to. Granted, I am taking college classes, but I don’t mind college at all and it’s so different. Growing up, I hated going back to school. I never minded the classes, work or the learning – I just hated school.
The only thing I loved about going back to school was back to school shopping. I have a weakness for office supplies so that was the only thing about it I looked forward to. I haven’t really had much of an excuse the past couple of years to buy a lot of those kinds of things. Even with college classes, I maybe needed a binder, folder, or a notebook and that was about it. Working in an office now, I’ve had a bit of an excuse to buy office supplies I wanted and that would be handy.
I completed my first week of work today and while I loved it, it’s definitely an overwhelming experience. My anxiety had been on overdrive because I’m someone who doesn’t handle change well. I have a super hard time just embracing it and adjusting to it. And I’m so afraid of screwing up or just not knowing what I’m supposed to do. It doesn’t matter that I just started – I still put so much pressure on myself.
I also have some hearing loss, so it can make it really hard communicating with people and that makes my anxiety worse.
Debby, the woman whose job I’m taking over and who is training me, is so awesome and helpful. But she’s been doing it for a while and she is really good at it and I know I’m not going to be as good at it as her. When I started on Tuesday, she was originally not going to be there so I was going to be on my own. That sent my anxiety through the roof. In new situations, I’m not good at winging it what-so-ever. Thankfully, she ended up coming in so I wasn’t on my own and she helped me to jump right into things.
Reading is such a big part of my life; there is never a time where I’m not in the middle of a book. However, with as much as I love reading, I have so many times where I suffer from a reading slump. Currently, I’m suffering from a major one that’s been going on for about a month or two.
I’ve learned some tips and tricks over the past couple of years that have helped me to get out of one. Sometimes tricks that normally might work don’t always work for me so it’s something you just have to try and see what works for you.
I’ve never really been the ‘to-do’ list kind of person. Mostly because I just never feel like I have enough to do that I need a list to keep track. I always wish I did though because I just love having a lot to do. Recently, there has been things that have been drawing my attention that have needed to be done for quite some time.
Since I finished school in about mid-July, I’ve had a lot of time to myself, especially since I had a bit of time before I have school and work to worry about. I’ve decided since I have about a week and a half left to myself, might as well take advantage of it and be productive. Although all these things are just so time-consuming and when it comes to doing them, I just don’t want to. But I do have times where I’m really in the mood to do some “spring cleaning” and I like to take advantage of it while I can.